[{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"NewsArticle","@id":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/destinations\/singapore\/consent-in-a-marriage-yes-or-no-still-applies\/#NewsArticle","mainEntityOfPage":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/destinations\/singapore\/consent-in-a-marriage-yes-or-no-still-applies\/","headline":"Consent in a marriage: ‘yes’ or ‘no’ still applies","name":"Consent in a marriage: ‘yes’ or ‘no’ still applies","description":"This week’s panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an ‘adulting’ podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer. Here are some points from this week’s episode to start you thinking: How consent […]","datePublished":"2021-06-07","dateModified":"2021-12-06","author":{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/author\/amanda-goh\/#Person","name":"Amanda Goh","url":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/author\/amanda-goh\/","identifier":312,"image":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/c161f1a3c55428d3c1f2e6d6a5efbbb4593e8948c7fb6a0c2c2674c6c7d8216a?s=96&d=mm&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/c161f1a3c55428d3c1f2e6d6a5efbbb4593e8948c7fb6a0c2c2674c6c7d8216a?s=96&d=mm&r=g","height":96,"width":96}},"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"TheHomeGround Asia","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/wp-content\/uploads\/photo_2021-07-22-222533.jpeg","url":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/wp-content\/uploads\/photo_2021-07-22-222533.jpeg","width":640,"height":640}},"image":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/wp-content\/uploads\/1623051097051_Beyond_Within_-_Thumbnail_Template_EP_4_P2281280x62629.jpg","url":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/wp-content\/uploads\/1623051097051_Beyond_Within_-_Thumbnail_Template_EP_4_P2281280x62629.jpg","height":626,"width":1280},"url":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/destinations\/singapore\/consent-in-a-marriage-yes-or-no-still-applies\/","video":[{"@context":"http:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"VideoObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Uw58EXN5tV8#VideoObject","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Uw58EXN5tV8","name":"How Consent Applies in a Relationship","description":"In the second part of the fourth episode of Beyond Within, TheHomeGround Asia returns with new guests to dive deeper into the issue of consent for a sexual act and how it affects relationships. \nThis week's panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an 'adulting' podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer.\n\nHere are some points from this week's episode to start you thinking:\n\nHow consent applies in a relationship\n\nConsent is important in every relationship, even in a marriage.\n\nMr Koh, who has been married for 22 years, explains that it is important to seek consent in the bedroom and that it is a two-way street: \u201cBoth sides have to check in with each other, 'Are you okay with this?' And there has to be a clear 'yes' or 'no'.\u201d\n\nImproving relationships and understanding each other in a marriage\n\nBeing in a marriage is always about learning and growing together. Mr Koh shares his experience of being in a new marriage: \"It\u2019s all about making sure both parties are alright.\" \n\nCommunication is key in marriages, as well as learning from mistakes. A lack in communication can lead to a \"break of intimacy\u2026connection\", explains Mr Koh. \n\nMedia setting unrealistic relationship expectations\n\nIn this episode, the panellists also express their views on modern-day media and how it portrays an unrealistic expectation of relationships to their viewers. \n\nMr and Mrs Koh highlight how pop culture, such as Korean dramas, can create a \"false idea\" of what relationships are like. \n\nMrs Koh further notes that these misperceptions can be implanted into one\u2019s mind, resulting in a need to find the \"perfect\" relationship, similar to what they see on TV.  \n\nDealing with consent violations in the virtual space\n\nOn consent violations within the virtual space, Mr Koh says matter-of-factly: \"If you don\u2019t want it to get up anywhere, do not send it.\" \n\nHe also warns that uploading photos on certain platforms may inadvertently remove one's rights to that image: \"Check [your] privacy contents [terms and conditions], and all those consent that you have to give. You\u2019re giving your consent by clicking agree.\"\n\nEducating the younger generation\n\nMrs Koh shares her experience as a parent having to inform her children about consent violations, highlighting that she cannot depend on other people to educate them. \n\nShe also explains how schools are providing students with outdated information, not addressing current issues that the younger generations face. She also notes that society should be more open to talking about consent and consent violations, providing firm and accurate information regarding these situations. \n\nCoping with trauma from consent violations\n\nWomen tend to be \"overly responsible\", says Mrs Koh. taking the blame for something that is not their fault to begin with. \n\nTo cope with this trauma, survivors would need to work out what is one\u2019s responsibility and take ownership of that, but also what is not one's fault, so as to be able to heal and move on. \n\nMr Koh adds that it is important to have a strong support system during this time: \u2018The biggest part is to not be alone, and to not handle this by yourself.\"\n\n\nJoin the conversations on TheHomeGround Asia's Facebook and Instagram, and get the latest updates via Telegram.","thumbnailUrl":["https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/Uw58EXN5tV8\/default.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/Uw58EXN5tV8\/mqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/Uw58EXN5tV8\/hqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/Uw58EXN5tV8\/sddefault.jpg"],"uploadDate":"2021-06-07T06:01:55+00:00","duration":"PT14S","embedUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/Uw58EXN5tV8","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig#Organization","url":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig","name":"TheHomeGround Asia","description":"TheHomeGround Asia \u2013 Latest and trending news and events happening around Asia. Delving deeper to better explain stories. Letting readers voice their opinions. Watch events live and experiencing unique experiences.\n\nFacebook: https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thehomegroundasia\n\nInstagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thehomegroundasia\/\n","logo":{"url":"https:\/\/yt3.ggpht.com\/ytc\/AIdro_nAaybScfnw3DwceEgK8aGJiYTvRKG4NeB1bbwlAPwqNg=s800-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj","width":800,"height":800,"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Uw58EXN5tV8#VideoObject_publisher_logo_ImageObject"}},"potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Uw58EXN5tV8#VideoObject_potentialAction","target":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Uw58EXN5tV8&t={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"},"interactionStatistic":[[{"@type":"InteractionCounter","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Uw58EXN5tV8#VideoObject_interactionStatistic_WatchAction","interactionType":{"@type":"WatchAction"},"userInteractionCount":9}]]},{"@context":"http:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"VideoObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=pGbialn6oas#VideoObject","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=pGbialn6oas","name":"Improving Relationships and Understanding Each Other in a Marriage","description":"In the second part of the fourth episode of Beyond Within, TheHomeGround Asia returns with new guests to dive deeper into the issue of consent for a sexual act and how it affects relationships. \nThis week's panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an 'adulting' podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer.\n\nHere are some points from this week's episode to start you thinking:\n\nHow consent applies in a relationship\n\nConsent is important in every relationship, even in a marriage.\n\nMr Koh, who has been married for 22 years, explains that it is important to seek consent in the bedroom and that it is a two-way street: \u201cBoth sides have to check in with each other, 'Are you okay with this?' And there has to be a clear 'yes' or 'no'.\u201d\n\nImproving relationships and understanding each other in a marriage\n\nBeing in a marriage is always about learning and growing together. Mr Koh shares his experience of being in a new marriage: \"It\u2019s all about making sure both parties are alright.\" \n\nCommunication is key in marriages, as well as learning from mistakes. A lack in communication can lead to a \"break of intimacy\u2026connection\", explains Mr Koh. \n\nMedia setting unrealistic relationship expectations\n\nIn this episode, the panellists also express their views on modern-day media and how it portrays an unrealistic expectation of relationships to their viewers. \n\nMr and Mrs Koh highlight how pop culture, such as Korean dramas, can create a \"false idea\" of what relationships are like. \n\nMrs Koh further notes that these misperceptions can be implanted into one\u2019s mind, resulting in a need to find the \"perfect\" relationship, similar to what they see on TV.  \n\nDealing with consent violations in the virtual space\n\nOn consent violations within the virtual space, Mr Koh says matter-of-factly: \"If you don\u2019t want it to get up anywhere, do not send it.\" \n\nHe also warns that uploading photos on certain platforms may inadvertently remove one's rights to that image: \"Check [your] privacy contents [terms and conditions], and all those consent that you have to give. You\u2019re giving your consent by clicking agree.\"\n\nEducating the younger generation\n\nMrs Koh shares her experience as a parent having to inform her children about consent violations, highlighting that she cannot depend on other people to educate them. \n\nShe also explains how schools are providing students with outdated information, not addressing current issues that the younger generations face. She also notes that society should be more open to talking about consent and consent violations, providing firm and accurate information regarding these situations. \n\nCoping with trauma from consent violations\n\nWomen tend to be \"overly responsible\", says Mrs Koh. taking the blame for something that is not their fault to begin with. \n\nTo cope with this trauma, survivors would need to work out what is one\u2019s responsibility and take ownership of that, but also what is not one's fault, so as to be able to heal and move on. \n\nMr Koh adds that it is important to have a strong support system during this time: \u2018The biggest part is to not be alone, and to not handle this by yourself.\"\n\n\nJoin the conversations on TheHomeGround Asia's Facebook and Instagram, and get the latest updates via Telegram.","thumbnailUrl":["https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/pGbialn6oas\/default.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/pGbialn6oas\/mqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/pGbialn6oas\/hqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/pGbialn6oas\/sddefault.jpg"],"uploadDate":"2021-06-07T06:01:59+00:00","duration":"PT16S","embedUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/pGbialn6oas","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig#Organization","url":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig","name":"TheHomeGround Asia","description":"TheHomeGround Asia \u2013 Latest and trending news and events happening around Asia. Delving deeper to better explain stories. Letting readers voice their opinions. Watch events live and experiencing unique experiences.\n\nFacebook: https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thehomegroundasia\n\nInstagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thehomegroundasia\/\n","logo":{"url":"https:\/\/yt3.ggpht.com\/ytc\/AIdro_nAaybScfnw3DwceEgK8aGJiYTvRKG4NeB1bbwlAPwqNg=s800-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj","width":800,"height":800,"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=pGbialn6oas#VideoObject_publisher_logo_ImageObject"}},"potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=pGbialn6oas#VideoObject_potentialAction","target":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=pGbialn6oas&t={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"},"interactionStatistic":[[{"@type":"InteractionCounter","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=pGbialn6oas#VideoObject_interactionStatistic_WatchAction","interactionType":{"@type":"WatchAction"},"userInteractionCount":8}]]},{"@context":"http:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"VideoObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PgJ4B1ZleIg#VideoObject","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PgJ4B1ZleIg","name":"Current Day Media Setting Unrealistic Relationship Expectations","description":"In the second part of the fourth episode of Beyond Within, TheHomeGround Asia returns with new guests to dive deeper into the issue of consent for a sexual act and how it affects relationships. \nThis week's panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an 'adulting' podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer.\n\nHere are some points from this week's episode to start you thinking:\n\nHow consent applies in a relationship\n\nConsent is important in every relationship, even in a marriage.\n\nMr Koh, who has been married for 22 years, explains that it is important to seek consent in the bedroom and that it is a two-way street: \u201cBoth sides have to check in with each other, 'Are you okay with this?' And there has to be a clear 'yes' or 'no'.\u201d\n\nImproving relationships and understanding each other in a marriage\n\nBeing in a marriage is always about learning and growing together. Mr Koh shares his experience of being in a new marriage: \"It\u2019s all about making sure both parties are alright.\" \n\nCommunication is key in marriages, as well as learning from mistakes. A lack in communication can lead to a \"break of intimacy\u2026connection\", explains Mr Koh. \n\nMedia setting unrealistic relationship expectations\n\nIn this episode, the panellists also express their views on modern-day media and how it portrays an unrealistic expectation of relationships to their viewers. \n\nMr and Mrs Koh highlight how pop culture, such as Korean dramas, can create a \"false idea\" of what relationships are like. \n\nMrs Koh further notes that these misperceptions can be implanted into one\u2019s mind, resulting in a need to find the \"perfect\" relationship, similar to what they see on TV.  \n\nDealing with consent violations in the virtual space\n\nOn consent violations within the virtual space, Mr Koh says matter-of-factly: \"If you don\u2019t want it to get up anywhere, do not send it.\" \n\nHe also warns that uploading photos on certain platforms may inadvertently remove one's rights to that image: \"Check [your] privacy contents [terms and conditions], and all those consent that you have to give. You\u2019re giving your consent by clicking agree.\"\n\nEducating the younger generation\n\nMrs Koh shares her experience as a parent having to inform her children about consent violations, highlighting that she cannot depend on other people to educate them. \n\nShe also explains how schools are providing students with outdated information, not addressing current issues that the younger generations face. She also notes that society should be more open to talking about consent and consent violations, providing firm and accurate information regarding these situations. \n\nCoping with trauma from consent violations\n\nWomen tend to be \"overly responsible\", says Mrs Koh. taking the blame for something that is not their fault to begin with. \n\nTo cope with this trauma, survivors would need to work out what is one\u2019s responsibility and take ownership of that, but also what is not one's fault, so as to be able to heal and move on. \n\nMr Koh adds that it is important to have a strong support system during this time: \u2018The biggest part is to not be alone, and to not handle this by yourself.\"\n\n\nJoin the conversations on TheHomeGround Asia's Facebook and Instagram, and get the latest updates via Telegram.","thumbnailUrl":["https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/PgJ4B1ZleIg\/default.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/PgJ4B1ZleIg\/mqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/PgJ4B1ZleIg\/hqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/PgJ4B1ZleIg\/sddefault.jpg"],"uploadDate":"2021-06-07T06:02:03+00:00","duration":"PT33S","embedUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/PgJ4B1ZleIg","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig#Organization","url":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig","name":"TheHomeGround Asia","description":"TheHomeGround Asia \u2013 Latest and trending news and events happening around Asia. Delving deeper to better explain stories. Letting readers voice their opinions. Watch events live and experiencing unique experiences.\n\nFacebook: https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thehomegroundasia\n\nInstagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thehomegroundasia\/\n","logo":{"url":"https:\/\/yt3.ggpht.com\/ytc\/AIdro_nAaybScfnw3DwceEgK8aGJiYTvRKG4NeB1bbwlAPwqNg=s800-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj","width":800,"height":800,"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PgJ4B1ZleIg#VideoObject_publisher_logo_ImageObject"}},"potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PgJ4B1ZleIg#VideoObject_potentialAction","target":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PgJ4B1ZleIg&t={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"},"interactionStatistic":[[{"@type":"InteractionCounter","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PgJ4B1ZleIg#VideoObject_interactionStatistic_WatchAction","interactionType":{"@type":"WatchAction"},"userInteractionCount":6}]]},{"@context":"http:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"VideoObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=qkgNL6ikysU#VideoObject","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=qkgNL6ikysU","name":"Dealing With Consent Violations in the Virtual Space","description":"In the second part of the fourth episode of Beyond Within, TheHomeGround Asia returns with new guests to dive deeper into the issue of consent for a sexual act and how it affects relationships. \nThis week's panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an 'adulting' podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer.\n\nHere are some points from this week's episode to start you thinking:\n\nHow consent applies in a relationship\n\nConsent is important in every relationship, even in a marriage.\n\nMr Koh, who has been married for 22 years, explains that it is important to seek consent in the bedroom and that it is a two-way street: \u201cBoth sides have to check in with each other, 'Are you okay with this?' And there has to be a clear 'yes' or 'no'.\u201d\n\nImproving relationships and understanding each other in a marriage\n\nBeing in a marriage is always about learning and growing together. Mr Koh shares his experience of being in a new marriage: \"It\u2019s all about making sure both parties are alright.\" \n\nCommunication is key in marriages, as well as learning from mistakes. A lack in communication can lead to a \"break of intimacy\u2026connection\", explains Mr Koh. \n\nMedia setting unrealistic relationship expectations\n\nIn this episode, the panellists also express their views on modern-day media and how it portrays an unrealistic expectation of relationships to their viewers. \n\nMr and Mrs Koh highlight how pop culture, such as Korean dramas, can create a \"false idea\" of what relationships are like. \n\nMrs Koh further notes that these misperceptions can be implanted into one\u2019s mind, resulting in a need to find the \"perfect\" relationship, similar to what they see on TV.  \n\nDealing with consent violations in the virtual space\n\nOn consent violations within the virtual space, Mr Koh says matter-of-factly: \"If you don\u2019t want it to get up anywhere, do not send it.\" \n\nHe also warns that uploading photos on certain platforms may inadvertently remove one's rights to that image: \"Check [your] privacy contents [terms and conditions], and all those consent that you have to give. You\u2019re giving your consent by clicking agree.\"\n\nEducating the younger generation\n\nMrs Koh shares her experience as a parent having to inform her children about consent violations, highlighting that she cannot depend on other people to educate them. \n\nShe also explains how schools are providing students with outdated information, not addressing current issues that the younger generations face. She also notes that society should be more open to talking about consent and consent violations, providing firm and accurate information regarding these situations. \n\nCoping with trauma from consent violations\n\nWomen tend to be \"overly responsible\", says Mrs Koh. taking the blame for something that is not their fault to begin with. \n\nTo cope with this trauma, survivors would need to work out what is one\u2019s responsibility and take ownership of that, but also what is not one's fault, so as to be able to heal and move on. \n\nMr Koh adds that it is important to have a strong support system during this time: \u2018The biggest part is to not be alone, and to not handle this by yourself.\"\n\n\nJoin the conversations on TheHomeGround Asia's Facebook and Instagram, and get the latest updates via Telegram.","thumbnailUrl":["https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/qkgNL6ikysU\/default.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/qkgNL6ikysU\/mqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/qkgNL6ikysU\/hqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/qkgNL6ikysU\/sddefault.jpg"],"uploadDate":"2021-06-07T06:02:10+00:00","duration":"PT25S","embedUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/qkgNL6ikysU","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig#Organization","url":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig","name":"TheHomeGround Asia","description":"TheHomeGround Asia \u2013 Latest and trending news and events happening around Asia. Delving deeper to better explain stories. Letting readers voice their opinions. Watch events live and experiencing unique experiences.\n\nFacebook: https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thehomegroundasia\n\nInstagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thehomegroundasia\/\n","logo":{"url":"https:\/\/yt3.ggpht.com\/ytc\/AIdro_nAaybScfnw3DwceEgK8aGJiYTvRKG4NeB1bbwlAPwqNg=s800-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj","width":800,"height":800,"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=qkgNL6ikysU#VideoObject_publisher_logo_ImageObject"}},"potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=qkgNL6ikysU#VideoObject_potentialAction","target":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=qkgNL6ikysU&t={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"},"interactionStatistic":[[{"@type":"InteractionCounter","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=qkgNL6ikysU#VideoObject_interactionStatistic_WatchAction","interactionType":{"@type":"WatchAction"},"userInteractionCount":3}]]},{"@context":"http:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"VideoObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=nWn3B78-9wE#VideoObject","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=nWn3B78-9wE","name":"Educating The Younger Generation","description":"In the second part of the fourth episode of Beyond Within, TheHomeGround Asia returns with new guests to dive deeper into the issue of consent for a sexual act and how it affects relationships. \nThis week's panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an 'adulting' podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer.\n\nHere are some points from this week's episode to start you thinking:\n\nHow consent applies in a relationship\n\nConsent is important in every relationship, even in a marriage.\n\nMr Koh, who has been married for 22 years, explains that it is important to seek consent in the bedroom and that it is a two-way street: \u201cBoth sides have to check in with each other, 'Are you okay with this?' And there has to be a clear 'yes' or 'no'.\u201d\n\nImproving relationships and understanding each other in a marriage\n\nBeing in a marriage is always about learning and growing together. Mr Koh shares his experience of being in a new marriage: \"It\u2019s all about making sure both parties are alright.\" \n\nCommunication is key in marriages, as well as learning from mistakes. A lack in communication can lead to a \"break of intimacy\u2026connection\", explains Mr Koh. \n\nMedia setting unrealistic relationship expectations\n\nIn this episode, the panellists also express their views on modern-day media and how it portrays an unrealistic expectation of relationships to their viewers. \n\nMr and Mrs Koh highlight how pop culture, such as Korean dramas, can create a \"false idea\" of what relationships are like. \n\nMrs Koh further notes that these misperceptions can be implanted into one\u2019s mind, resulting in a need to find the \"perfect\" relationship, similar to what they see on TV.  \n\nDealing with consent violations in the virtual space\n\nOn consent violations within the virtual space, Mr Koh says matter-of-factly: \"If you don\u2019t want it to get up anywhere, do not send it.\" \n\nHe also warns that uploading photos on certain platforms may inadvertently remove one's rights to that image: \"Check [your] privacy contents [terms and conditions], and all those consent that you have to give. You\u2019re giving your consent by clicking agree.\"\n\nEducating the younger generation\n\nMrs Koh shares her experience as a parent having to inform her children about consent violations, highlighting that she cannot depend on other people to educate them. \n\nShe also explains how schools are providing students with outdated information, not addressing current issues that the younger generations face. She also notes that society should be more open to talking about consent and consent violations, providing firm and accurate information regarding these situations. \n\nCoping with trauma from consent violations\n\nWomen tend to be \"overly responsible\", says Mrs Koh. taking the blame for something that is not their fault to begin with. \n\nTo cope with this trauma, survivors would need to work out what is one\u2019s responsibility and take ownership of that, but also what is not one's fault, so as to be able to heal and move on. \n\nMr Koh adds that it is important to have a strong support system during this time: \u2018The biggest part is to not be alone, and to not handle this by yourself.\"\n\n\nJoin the conversations on TheHomeGround Asia's Facebook and Instagram, and get the latest updates via Telegram.","thumbnailUrl":["https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/nWn3B78-9wE\/default.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/nWn3B78-9wE\/mqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/nWn3B78-9wE\/hqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/nWn3B78-9wE\/sddefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/nWn3B78-9wE\/maxresdefault.jpg"],"uploadDate":"2021-06-07T06:02:16+00:00","duration":"PT19S","embedUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/nWn3B78-9wE","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig#Organization","url":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig","name":"TheHomeGround Asia","description":"TheHomeGround Asia \u2013 Latest and trending news and events happening around Asia. Delving deeper to better explain stories. Letting readers voice their opinions. Watch events live and experiencing unique experiences.\n\nFacebook: https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thehomegroundasia\n\nInstagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thehomegroundasia\/\n","logo":{"url":"https:\/\/yt3.ggpht.com\/ytc\/AIdro_nAaybScfnw3DwceEgK8aGJiYTvRKG4NeB1bbwlAPwqNg=s800-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj","width":800,"height":800,"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=nWn3B78-9wE#VideoObject_publisher_logo_ImageObject"}},"potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=nWn3B78-9wE#VideoObject_potentialAction","target":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=nWn3B78-9wE&t={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"},"interactionStatistic":[[{"@type":"InteractionCounter","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=nWn3B78-9wE#VideoObject_interactionStatistic_WatchAction","interactionType":{"@type":"WatchAction"},"userInteractionCount":3}]]},{"@context":"http:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"VideoObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=J3zfH6axaJI#VideoObject","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=J3zfH6axaJI","name":"Coping with Trauma from Consent Violations","description":"In the second part of the fourth episode of Beyond Within, TheHomeGround Asia returns with new guests to dive deeper into the issue of consent for a sexual act and how it affects relationships. \nThis week's panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an 'adulting' podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer.\n\nHere are some points from this week's episode to start you thinking:\n\nHow consent applies in a relationship\n\nConsent is important in every relationship, even in a marriage.\n\nMr Koh, who has been married for 22 years, explains that it is important to seek consent in the bedroom and that it is a two-way street: \u201cBoth sides have to check in with each other, 'Are you okay with this?' And there has to be a clear 'yes' or 'no'.\u201d\n\nImproving relationships and understanding each other in a marriage\n\nBeing in a marriage is always about learning and growing together. Mr Koh shares his experience of being in a new marriage: \"It\u2019s all about making sure both parties are alright.\" \n\nCommunication is key in marriages, as well as learning from mistakes. A lack in communication can lead to a \"break of intimacy\u2026connection\", explains Mr Koh. \n\nMedia setting unrealistic relationship expectations\n\nIn this episode, the panellists also express their views on modern-day media and how it portrays an unrealistic expectation of relationships to their viewers. \n\nMr and Mrs Koh highlight how pop culture, such as Korean dramas, can create a \"false idea\" of what relationships are like. \n\nMrs Koh further notes that these misperceptions can be implanted into one\u2019s mind, resulting in a need to find the \"perfect\" relationship, similar to what they see on TV.  \n\nDealing with consent violations in the virtual space\n\nOn consent violations within the virtual space, Mr Koh says matter-of-factly: \"If you don\u2019t want it to get up anywhere, do not send it.\" \n\nHe also warns that uploading photos on certain platforms may inadvertently remove one's rights to that image: \"Check [your] privacy contents [terms and conditions], and all those consent that you have to give. You\u2019re giving your consent by clicking agree.\"\n\nEducating the younger generation\n\nMrs Koh shares her experience as a parent having to inform her children about consent violations, highlighting that she cannot depend on other people to educate them. \n\nShe also explains how schools are providing students with outdated information, not addressing current issues that the younger generations face. She also notes that society should be more open to talking about consent and consent violations, providing firm and accurate information regarding these situations. \n\nCoping with trauma from consent violations\n\nWomen tend to be \"overly responsible\", says Mrs Koh. taking the blame for something that is not their fault to begin with. \n\nTo cope with this trauma, survivors would need to work out what is one\u2019s responsibility and take ownership of that, but also what is not one's fault, so as to be able to heal and move on. \n\nMr Koh adds that it is important to have a strong support system during this time: \u2018The biggest part is to not be alone, and to not handle this by yourself.\"\n\n\nJoin the conversations on TheHomeGround Asia's Facebook and Instagram, and get the latest updates via Telegram.","thumbnailUrl":["https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/J3zfH6axaJI\/default.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/J3zfH6axaJI\/mqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/J3zfH6axaJI\/hqdefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/J3zfH6axaJI\/sddefault.jpg","https:\/\/i.ytimg.com\/vi\/J3zfH6axaJI\/maxresdefault.jpg"],"uploadDate":"2021-06-07T06:02:21+00:00","duration":"PT22S","embedUrl":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/J3zfH6axaJI","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig#Organization","url":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCymcdY7G_Wt7S5duyR7Bbig","name":"TheHomeGround Asia","description":"TheHomeGround Asia \u2013 Latest and trending news and events happening around Asia. Delving deeper to better explain stories. Letting readers voice their opinions. Watch events live and experiencing unique experiences.\n\nFacebook: https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/thehomegroundasia\n\nInstagram: https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/thehomegroundasia\/\n","logo":{"url":"https:\/\/yt3.ggpht.com\/ytc\/AIdro_nAaybScfnw3DwceEgK8aGJiYTvRKG4NeB1bbwlAPwqNg=s800-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj","width":800,"height":800,"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=J3zfH6axaJI#VideoObject_publisher_logo_ImageObject"}},"potentialAction":{"@type":"SeekToAction","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=J3zfH6axaJI#VideoObject_potentialAction","target":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=J3zfH6axaJI&t={seek_to_second_number}","startOffset-input":"required name=seek_to_second_number"},"interactionStatistic":[[{"@type":"InteractionCounter","@id":"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=J3zfH6axaJI#VideoObject_interactionStatistic_WatchAction","interactionType":{"@type":"WatchAction"},"userInteractionCount":2}]]}],"about":["Community","Health & Wellness","Local","Sex & Gender","Singapore"],"wordCount":536,"articleBody":"This week’s panellists include two married couples: Aaroson Koh, Co-founder of an ‘adulting’ podcast called Mental Dumbells and Candice Koh, a flight attendant; as well as Lisa Tan-Koh, a certified professional coach and Lionel Koh, a professional (mind and emotion) clearer.Here are some points from this week’s episode to start you thinking:How consent applies in a relationshipConsent is important in every relationship, even in a marriage. Lionel Koh, who has been married for 22 years, explains that it is important to seek consent in the bedroom and that it is a two-way street: \u201cBoth sides have to check in with each other, ‘Are you okay with this?’ And there has to be a clear ‘yes’ or ‘no’.\u201dImproving relationships and understanding each other in a marriageBeing in a marriage is always about learning and growing together. Aaroson Koh shares his experience of being in a new marriage: “It\u2019s all about making sure both parties are alright.”\u00a0Communication is key in marriages, as well as learning from mistakes. A lack in communication can lead to a “break of intimacy… connection”, he explains.\u00a0Media setting unrealistic relationship expectationsIn this episode, the panellists also express their views on modern-day media and how it portrays an unrealistic expectation of relationships to their viewers.\u00a0Mr and Mrs Aaroson Koh highlight how pop culture, such as Korean dramas, can create a “false idea” of what relationships are like.\u00a0Mrs Koh further notes that these misperceptions can be implanted into one\u2019s mind, resulting in a need to find the “perfect” relationship, similar to what they see on TV.\u00a0\u00a0Dealing with consent violations in the virtual spaceOn consent violations within the virtual space, Lionel Koh says matter-of-factly: “If you don\u2019t want it to get up anywhere, do not send it.”\u00a0He also warns that uploading photos on certain platforms may inadvertently remove one’s rights to that image: “Check [your] privacy contents [terms and conditions], and all those consent that you have to give. You\u2019re giving your consent by clicking agree.”Educating the younger generationMrs Lisa Tan-Koh shares her experience as a parent having to inform her children about consent violations, highlighting that she cannot depend on other people to educate them.\u00a0She also explains how schools are providing students with outdated information, not addressing current issues that the younger generations face. She also notes that society should be more open to talking about consent and consent violations, providing firm and accurate information regarding these situations.\u00a0Coping with trauma from consent violationsWomen tend to be “overly responsible”, says Mrs Tan-Koh. taking the blame for something that is not their fault to begin with.\u00a0To cope with this trauma, survivors would need to work out what is one\u2019s responsibility and take ownership of that, but also what is not one’s fault, so as to be able to heal and move on.\u00a0Mr Lionel Koh adds that it is important to have a strong support system during this time: \u2018The biggest part is to not be alone, and to not handle this by yourself.”Join the conversations on TheHomeGround Asia’s Facebook\u00a0and\u00a0Instagram, and get the latest updates via\u00a0Telegram."},{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Destinations","item":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/destinations\/#breadcrumbitem"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Singapore","item":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/destinations\/\/singapore\/#breadcrumbitem"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":3,"name":"Consent in a marriage: ‘yes’ or ‘no’ still applies","item":"https:\/\/thehomeground.asia\/destinations\/singapore\/consent-in-a-marriage-yes-or-no-still-applies\/#breadcrumbitem"}]}]